Homecoming

So my life was totally course corrected this week.

I had made a decision. An impulsive, non-thinking, wild decision, and it was clearly not the right one. Ooh, that sucks. So stress and worry and tears and ickiness followed this decision. I tried to figure out why I had made such a terrible choice. I tried to wake myself up from that nightmare. I wished and I prayed that I could go back and change my mind. I regretted and fretted and lost some weight(!). But there was no going back.

Unless, maybe, there was. Put aside the regret and the fear and the disappointment and the self-doubt for a minute. Focus on making my life the way I would like it to be. And presto! Course correction! Okay so fate didn't REALLY adjust my life to path I was meant to be on. Nope, I did that myself. And it feels just like coming home.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

No time to blog these past few weeks. Finishing up at Lifelong. Starting up at KEXP. So much going on, and so little time.

Seems like my life has been almost constantly changing since I arrived in Seattle two years ago. And here we go again. Another big change. Weirdly, I'm sort of starting to get used to all of these changes. Where I used to fear change, I now embrace it, look forward to it, enjoy it. I realize that change helps me to stay present and aware. I am hugely interested in evolution and personal growth, and I feel unbelievably lucky to be in the time and the place and the state of mind I am in right now.

And with all the change that has come in past two years, who knows what's next? The possibilities make me giddy.

Correction, my dear

I think it must have something to do with LOST, but lately, I have become a huge fan of the idea of course correction. Mostly this just means fate, but I like the phrase "course correction". While having our Sunday morning pho, Tim and I were talking about how small chance meetings or happenings can take your life in a completely new and different direction. I think that there are certain people we are just destined to meet. One way or another, even with missed connections and all that, these meetings are just meant to be. Course correction will see to that. Now the question is: does this idea just give us all free reign to do whatever we want because fate will eventually step in? I would say, because I also believe in karma, that the answer is no. Karma and fate go hand-in-hand. We get what we give. I find this idea comforting. As long as I try to be a good person, to be kind to others, to practice empathy, I will end up where I am meant to be.
Sometimes I look back through the past few years, and I have some regrets. I question some of my decisions. But then I remember that all of these choices led me to where I am today. Where I'm meant to be. And I love where that is.